This is really a difficult decision, as BEng graduate (3-year studies) from University of Nottingham Malaysia will not be accredited by Board of Engineer Malaysia, they only accredited 4-years engineering programme. Well, basically ONLY Malaysia, it was accredited by all the other countries around the world. However, this might be an issue to Malaysian engineers who work in certain companies in Malaysia.
I already had a glimpse of thought to end Chemical with Environmental Engineering with BEng in Year 3 during Year 2 in UK. However I was too busy and too happy with my life, indulging in the relaxing life without even want to think about it. Is this actually an illusion? An illusion in different communicating, teaching and learning culture, which I am better in coping with it rather than my own country.
Well, when I resumed my life in Malaysia in Year 3 which I was feeling excited to study air pollution and water treatment that I thought I can learn some practical stuffs and knowledge. In the end, NO, they are some other general , fact-learning modules like those environmental modules in previous years. Although I cannot deny that I did learnt knowledge about it, but not as much as I expected. Moreover, what I expected in "Chemical with Environmental Engineering" is more like 50% and 50% proportion, but till Year 3 it is still almost 90% Chemical Engineering, most of the environment portion are those not-really-practical environmental engineering stuffs.
Is this because of the stress of design project which makes me quit? Well, it is not 100% true. The stress comes when you are doing things you are seriously not keen on it, at least to a person like me, yes. It makes me realize that I am not really into that. I recall the innocent me who always going excited over environmental stuffs since secondary school. Although my aim is clear to enter the environmental field since foundation, however I had lost myself in the happy study life, until it becomes not happy this year LOL. I re-discover the true me, which this course in UNMC cannot satisfy me. So what is the point to continue with something I don't like and get myself tortured and stressed? This year is a year which I cry over academic studies in my whole life. Yeah, I am NOT HAPPY.
The more I am exposed to engineering industry, the more I feel that chemical engineering is a job with responsibility almost as great as doctor and lawyer, which can affect human's life or even take thousand lives in 1 go, no matter you are a process engineer or a design engineer. Although my admiration towards engineering grows over time, however I am not confident enough to be one of those great engineers. Anyhow, I am proud to be called as an engineer.
In addition, I already make up my mind not going to be only an engineer my whole life. There are much much more to be explored in the world, but who knows? Life is unpredictable.
If after the year-long Global Internship Programme that I am planning to sign up, I feel like working, then I work; if feel like studying, then proceed with MSc. Human's thinking and personality will grow and change over time. If the company I enter wants to sponsor me to study MSc for accreditation that is even better. Or if I have opportunity to be in the music field (which I think is not possible), I might just wave bye-bye to engineering.
I am not looking forward to become a successful and "big" person. I just want a stable and happy life with stable income while doing things I like. I don't need a big house, don't care about having any "dream cars", what I want is a happy life with my family, friends and future-soulmate-to-be and to travel around and meet new friends.
When you find that the route you are on is not what you want anymore, go back to find your true self. Instead of regretting what you had chosen along the way, go back, let your life turn zero, and depart again to the most suitable route. Although there might be obstacles and struggles, at least you are determined enough to do what you want. Although there are some routes that you like very very much but you are not able to achieve it (my 1st passion is music), at least choose your 2nd passion.
Life is really really dull if you do things you don't like.
LIFE IS UNPREDICTABLE.
Who can predict the future even though if you continue with the proper route?
Your future only holds in your hands, be responsible to what you decide.
Even though it turns out not to be good, bare the consequences.
~Be true to your heart if you can~
希望我能在平凡中，活得不平凡。
**P.S:
Daddy, I might not be able to realise the promise of buying you a Lamborghini anymore.
I have chosen a non-smooth, insecure future.
** Please ignore all the grammar mistakes, I just wanna write randomly and freely to express my feelings in a simple way :)
